"There is no such thing as the perfect person." This simple piece of advice was given to me by my therapist last year and has stuck with me. The problem is, the disconnect between understanding this and actually applying it. You know what I want in a woman? The biggest thing I want is attractiveness. I could really care less what she does for a living, if she's smart, etc, I just want her to be smoking hot. I try to tell myself that other qualities are important, that nobody is perfect,etc, but I still catch myself falling into the physical beauty trap. Aside from my marriage, the longest relationship I was ever in was a little over two years. Looking back, I think that the number one reason it lasted so long was because she was gorgeous. Even after a few years together , I was still just as attracted to her as I was when I first saw her. I would look at her and think, what the hell is she she doing with me? I remember going to a bar or even the store and see guys checking her out and I liked it. It was the ultimate ego trip. I think alot of this stemmed from the fact that I was a late bloomer. I didn't even have my first date until the end of my senior year in high school. n my late teens, I started noticing that women were frequently looking at me/hitting on me. This is where things started going wrong. My ego and self confidence began to grow after each girl I slept with and or dated. Over time, if a not so attractive girl would hit on me, I would think to myself, "is she serious? Does she really think she has a chance with me?" Gone was the shy, innocent boy and in its place was a monster. It was as if I had something to prove as if I was trying to make up for lost time. I was and still am out of control. I don't see people as having feelings of their own. Its as if there are disposable. Nameless,faceless objects, here for my amusement.
Of course, I realize that this is wrong. I wish I could wear a sign or something, saying "danger! stay away!" But then I catch myself falling into the same trap and the cycle repeats itself.
I'm not sure if this post really has a point, other to give you insight into my world.
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2 comments:
Wow. This is a lot to process, mostly because you seem to be serious about this. Without sounding smug and patronizing, it's hard to explain that this habit you seem to have with valuing someone's exterior over their interior should pass. Soon. Maybe you should make it pass sooner. You'll probably meet someone who will dash this habit of yours...someone who is attractive enough, but what they've got inside their brain and their heart will turn out to be the real draw.
The author is briefly discussed the article reflection. This is a lot of process seem to be serious about this
You'll probably meet someone who will dash this habit of yours...someone who is attractive enough, but what they've got inside their brain and their heart will turn out to be the real draw. At first time i find the one person who is willing to change his attitude and hope so he will get soon what he want
thank u
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